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Postby Hairglamfan » Tue Nov 20, 2007 3:08 pm

A man is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sittining on a little perch. It does'nt have any feet or legs. The guy says out loud,"Golly,I wonder what happened to this parrot?"
The parrot says,"I was born this way.I'm a defective parrot"
"Holy Crap" the guy replies."You actually understood and answered me!"
"I got every word",says the parrot " I happen to be a highly intelligent,thoroughly educated bird"
"Oh Yeah?" the man asks,"then answer me this-- How do you hang on to your perch without any feet?"
"Well",the parrot says," this is very embarrassing but since you asked,I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a hook.You cant see it because of my feathers."
"WOW",says the guy.""You can really understand and speak english,cant you?"
"Actually I speak Spanish & English & I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics,religion,sport,physics,philosophy.You really ought to buy me,I'd be a great companion."
The guy looks at the $200 price tag."Sorry, but I just cant afford that."
"Psssssst" says the parrot,"I'm defective,so the truth is nobody wants me 'cause I dont have any feet.You can probably get me for $20,just make the guy an offer."
The man offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.
Weeks go by-The parrot is sensational.He has a great sense of humor,he's interesting,he's a great pal,he understands everything,he sympathizes and he's insightful.The man is delighted.
One day the man comes home from work and the parrot goes "PSSSSSSST.'' and motions him over with one wing."I dont know if I should tell you this or not,but its about your wife and the postman."
"What are you talking about?" asks the man.
"When the postman delivered the mail today,your wife greeted him at the door in a sheer black nightie."
"WHAT??" the guy says incredulously."Then what happened?''
"Well then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie and began to kiss her all over" reported the parrot.
"No" he exclaimed."And she let him?"
"Yes,then he continued taking off her nightie,got down on his knees and began to kiss her all over".
Then the frantic man screams "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"
"Damned if I know,I got an erection and fell off my perch!!!
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