The Wisdom Of Life

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The Wisdom Of Life

Postby Detritus » Wed May 09, 2007 1:51 pm

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of
me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty
much leave me the hell alone

2. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal
your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

3. Sex is like air -- it's not important unless you aren't getting

> any.
> 4. No one is listening until you fart.
> 5. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple

> of car payments.
> 6. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their
> shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away, and you
> have their shoes.
> 7. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
> 8. Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day.
> Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all
> day.
> 9. If you
lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was

> worth it.
> 10. Don't worry--It only seems kinky the first time.
> 11. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that
> comes from bad judgment.
> 12. There are two theories about arguing with women. Neither one
> works.
> 13. Experience is something you don't get until just after you
> need it.
> 14. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a
> laxative on the same night .
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